Tag Archives: aerialist

‘I don’t want to be a twat’

An aerialist (a super acrobat) came by the other day to see if Rob wanted to buy her bikes.

She had a fantastic vintage Schwinn she had brought all the way from New York and a wonderful little red shopper she had bought in Italy. An enviable collection she had picked up on her acrobatic travels!

‘Would you like the buy them’ she inquired, ‘I am changing my life, I don’t want to be a twat, I decided to buy a mountain bike’. (I am confused to).

Rob bought them and I have taken 50% of the twat factor by taking the red shopper off his hands (I have to sell my blue shopper to make way, as we have introduced a one in one out rule at my flat).

If anybody is interested in making a twat of themselves on this bloody fine looking machine, then come in and let it be known ‘My name is …..(YOUR NAME) and I am looking to become a twat/more of a twat (DELETE AS APPROPRIATE). I have the £175  here in cash and I am looking to move fast’.

This Schwinn of Chicago has 3 gears and a back pedal brake (plus rear calliper brake). Neither myself or Rob have seen one of these before, now I am not saying we are experts or anything, but we think she is kind of rare, especially on this side of the pond.